(Commemorating Mary Daly 4) My Memoirs of Mary Daly (1928-2010) by Helen Hye-Sook Hwang

[Author’s Note: My personal encounter with Mary Daly, a U.S. post-Christian feminist thinker, goes back to 1994, if not earlier. I stayed in Korea from 1994-1997 during which I translated two of Mary Daly’s early books, Beyond God the Father: Toward a Philosophy of Women’s Liberation 하나님 아버지를 넘어서 (Seoul: Ewha Women’s University Press, 1996) and Church and the Second Sex 교회와 제 2의 성 (Seoul: Women’s News Press, 1997) in Korean. I carried with me to the U.S.A. our correspondences in the form of letters and documents mostly faxed to each other for the period of more than two decades. Later at one point I digitized them in images. Through these memoir series, I share some highlights of my memories with Mary Daly, her influence on my feminist thinking, and my own radical feminist journey to Magoist Cetaceanism.]

Mary had faxed me “Author’s Note to the Korean Edition of BGTF” dated September 23 1996, which I posted in a previous section of my memoire. My letter to her dated October 25 1996 shows that we talked on the phone between these two letters. My memory is vague, if Mary ever called me in Korea but I called her in the U.S. [It’s plausible that she called me too. She may have called me after faxing her letter to me.] In fact, I don’t have any recollection how I dealt with phone bills but it is possible that I had a way to handle international phone calls. Nonetheless, phone bills did not interfere my connection with Mary. That was not because I had enough money or was extravagant but because it was one of things that had to be done. Making a phone call to her was like turning on the light on the dark path that I just began to follow. Or connecting with Mary was like a dawn in my new day.

At that time, I was taking matters in my own hands. My mother was the top priority. I consciously connected with my mother for the first time (I was emotionally separated from my mother from a very young age and I responded to our needs of reconnecting with each other). That is a topic that I need to mention in another space. And connecting with Mary Daly was the second priority. I needed to connect with her not for her but for myself. Translating her books was a medium that made that possible in a special way. It was upaya (a perfect means to to serve multiple purposes), to borrow a Buddhist term. Don’t be mistaken that I attempted to gain something like public recognition or money, if it could. Mary made it clear that I did not have any other hidden agenda. In retrospect, Mary was in a difficult situation with Audre Lorde’s claim, which turned out to be a deliberately falsity. She did not know that I was no Audre Lorde in any manner. I was a liberated woman who finally chose her own destiny. I just enjoyed being alone apart from patriarchal fetters at last and doing what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

I had withdrawn my membership from a Catholic overseas missionary congregation based in the United States in early 1994. I did not know Mary Daly personally then. For the first time, I began to shape my life with my own hands! Letting go of the old self and the patriarchal institutions that I blindly accepted, I held tight onto things that gave me joy; things that made me feel that I was alive. I was breaking out my own shell to be self-birthed as a self-identified woman, a radical feminist. I chose a few and right things for myself.

My brother generously shared his small apartment with me when I just got out of the Philippines, my missionary field. Then, I needed a job to survive. Maryknoll Sisters in Korea were there to help me get on my own feet. They waited for me to join them and helped me when I left them. Everything seemed to fall in right places. I was able to teach English to some groups of neighboring children, while lecturing for an English language institute. I was lucky to get paid from these teaching opportunities. Making money was not that difficult for me at that time. My concern was to choose the right thing for the rest of my life rather than to make money to survive. In fact, nothing was difficult for me to do. Or I had nothing to lose. That is not to say that I has a source of income beyond what I earned. My life back in Korea was an easy one compared to the lives of people that I had met and lived together in the countries that I traveled and studied. The most important task was completed; I left Christianity and stopped feeding my dependency on patriarchal institutions. I jettisoned anything and everything that I did not need, which made me feel free and at peace at last. I was able to save some money to pay the tuition for the graduate school in the U.S. For the first time in my life that I made and saved money for myself. Prior to joining Maryknoll Sisters, I used to give away the money that I earned to those including my relatives who were in need of it.

In my letter to Mary Daly that I share below, I gave Mary the amount of US$12,000 that I would receive from the Ewha Press. I did not give that money to her but I had my press to pay her the full royalty, part of which I was supposed to receive. In fact, I had forgotten about that until I found this letter of mine. I wanted to support Mary in the best way that I could do and I was happy that I could do it. I had completely forgotten about the money factor between Mary and myself. Money was not event a means to me. It was a matter that just came along my way. I was no saint but was not bound by material needs. I did not surrender to money or anything other than the purpose of my life.

One who has a great vision of life knows no poverty. I am refreshed by what I wrote to Mary, “Know that I am united in your spirit giving my support to your struggles for your books. What a strange but real fight you and I, and those who see the same are having against this patriarchal world! Please think of me as your companion.” She did think of me as her companion in the coming years. Her death did not part us.

Helen Hye-Sook Hwang’s letter to Mary Daly, October 25 1996

October 25, 1996

Hye Sook Hwang

27-8, Pyoel Yang Dong
Kwachun City
Kyonggi-do, S. Korea

(02)504-0973


(617)630-9456
Dear Dr. Mary Daly,

It was nice that you answered back soon to me. I called the Ewha Press and was confirmed that this way of making private contacts between the author and the translator is not uncommon in Korea. Be assured that it will proceed the way we have talked on the phone.

To mention the conclusion first, there is a way that you will be payed of US$12,000 soon. I will be the one who will send you the money. So please sing the new contract form attached to this letter and fax it back to me as soon as possible. Then, I can fax again this signed contact to the Press. The Press will give me the money which will cover the royalty to the author. I do know know how much money will be given to me before the publication but at least it will cover US$12,000.

There was one thing that I was mistaken when I talked with you on the phone. The US$12,000 will be given to you from the money which I am supposed to receive upon issuing the first edition, that is, 15% of the price. This means that I will be payed very little on the first edition, or maybe none. However, that is O.K. with me. For sure I shall be payed the whole 15% on the second edition. May this day come ever soon so that I can share with you!

And now I figured out that the $12,000 is no less amount after all compared to the previous contract which is irrelevant now. I just misunderstood the previous contract on this point. Please understand my point on this. At least I made it possible for you to get payed after all. I know is not much money given for both the author and the translator, at least for this case with Ewha Press and “your book.” Definitely, it is not money making business, as we know.

So, when you fax me the signed contract, please let me know how you like to be payed. I will also find out the best way to send you US$12,000 through the bank in Korea. I had the impression that Ewha will proceed swiftly on this. However, knowing the university is one of the institutions that have so many bureaucratic layers, it might take some time.

That is all for now. If you have any clarification to make, please feel free to ask. Know that I am united in your spirit giving my support to your struggles for your books. What a strange but real fight you and I, and those who see the same are having against this patriarchal world! Please think of me as your companion.

With love,
Hye Sook

(To be continued)


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